Alone in Harm OCD thoughts about loved ones?

Hi - I have had issues with my OCD (specifically Harm OCD) where I get harm thoughts and images about me harming my precious family - currently about my precious grandson! I'm known to be a very kind, sensitive and loving person and I've never been violent nor do I have any feelings to be violent! It's mentally killing me - I am on meds and see a therapist - my family is so supportive but I feel so bad for them and me because I know they really can't do anything to help me and I know they feel bad that there's nothing they can really do to help me - I sometimes feel like I need to confess my thoughts to them - at the same time I don't want them to feel sad or scared about the harm thoughts I've had - they say they know I'm not a violent person and that I'd never do anything - I know from what I've read (online and in books about OCD) that usually people with Harm OCD worry they will want to act on their thoughts or that maybe they really want to harm someone but I don't have those fears at all! My main problem is just that I feel so bad for having the harm thoughts and images in the first place! I also feel bad when they see me upset - this is affecting my home life and my job - it's hard to turn off my OCD and anxiety when I walk in the door at work but I'm expected to :( (per my boss: "do your best to leave your personal problems at the door" - needless to say, I'm trying very hard to find a new job!)

I also find that when I do have Harm OCD issues I feel very drawn to reading online and in my books about Harm OCD - I guess I'm looking for reassurance?! I find myself spending a lot of time and energy on this - is this constant reading up on Harm OCD a compulsion? I guess I want to know why I have Harm OCD - I tend to feel sorry for myself, as in, "why me"? and "my family didn't ask for this!"

thank you for your time -
:(

Alone in Harm OCD thoughts about loved ones?